Today has been all about being a mother, and being a daughter.
Of course, it is every day. But given that it is Mothering Sunday here in the UK, today is the day I have chosen to post about the topic.
Today I have experienced a vast range of mothering and daughtering moments, and here are some I would like to share with you:
– My hoped for lie in didn’t happen, but I didn’t care a bit because I was woken at 7.20 a.m. by Two and Three, very excited to give me the present they had carefully chosen and paid for by themselves in town yesterday. It was a gorgeous small cushion with ‘A gift from the heart’ written on it, and I absolutely love it.
– One gave me some purple nail varnish and brought me a cup of tea in bed. Three had made a card which they had all signed. We all sat on my bed for ages, chatting and laughing. The love between us all was so tangible, and that was the best gift of all.
– While I was happily enjoying my children, I spared more than a passing thought for the following people: Those who are missing their mums. Those who wish they were mums. Those who find this day difficult for whatever reason. And a certain lady who was brave enough to give me up for adoption 39 and a half years ago. I will probably never meet her. But she is in my thoughts on this day.
– My mum, the lady who was brave enough to adopt me *grin* came round for lunch. We all enjoyed eating together and laughing together. She does so much for me and it was good to give something back today, to be the grown up daughter who invites grandma to lunch, just as she used to invite both my grandmas for lunch all those years ago. It felt good.
– Certain of the children got tired, silly, argumentative and finally the smallest one gave way to an enormous, wailing, out of control, hysterical, screaming and sobbing tantrum. It was exactly like having her back as a toddler again, and her toddlerhood was not an easy one. I was reminded sharply of the difficult, frustrating and noisy side of motherhood! She sobbed on my knee for a long time. I remained patient (which was a miracle).
– My wonderful mum offered to take home some of the washing queued up in my kitchen and do it for me. I am getting so much better at swallowing my pride these days and I accepted her offer with grateful thanks. I may be a grown up daughter but she will always want (and I think, need) to help.
– I got home from driving her back to her house with two binbags full of dirty washing, snuggled down on the sofa with Three, under her duvet, to calm her down further, and we both fell fast asleep for an hour and a half.
– At teatime tiredness was rife, and the children bickered their way through their cheese and crackers, while I snapped at them irritably. My favourite phrase ‘if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all’ has now become a family catchphrase and they all chorus it together, to send me up, while I conduct them!
– It has been a day to ponder on the highs and lows of motherhood, and the special gift of daughterhood. Even in the midst of the screaming and the sobbing and the washing and the chaos, I know how blessed I am.