It’s that point in the holidays where everything starts to fall apart…

– The house is beyond a tip and heading through squalid into downright dangerous. You think I’m joking. I promise it is no joke.

– We spent the whole morning out of the house at an appointment. Left at the last possible minute due to an ‘I can’t find my shoes’ crisis from one child. I consider this situation (and the shouting I did) practice for the school run next week, just in case I had forgotten how to do ‘flustered’…

– We made it to the appointment with two minutes to spare, against all the odds. I didn’t even break the speed limit.

– Got home at lunchtime, and knowing I am expecting a flying visit from partner and one of his parents with a trailer full of stuff including a worktop I bought dirt cheap in his town and had no way of getting back to my house, I decided to make flapjack so I had something interesting to feed them with their cups of tea.

– Yes, making flapjack came first, before I started thinking about what to do the children for their lunch. That’s the sort of mother I am.

– During the flapjack making I was interrupted by Three telling me that the hamsters had chewed around the window in their cage and it had fallen out. This happened with the other window a few months ago and both hamsters had made a break for it. We found them, and that window now has a blackout blind on it in the form of gaffer tape! On this occasion, only one hamster has disappeared. A second blackout blind was applied to hold the newly chewed window on, and the hamster is still AWOL.

– Bear in mind the totally desperate state of the dining room (where the hamster cage currently is) and you may get some idea of how impossible it is going to be to find the dear creature.

– The children have put food on the floor and a little box with cotton wool in, in the hope that Custard (sister of Rhubarb) will find food and box irresistible at some point in the near future. We cross our fingers now and hope for the best!

– The flapjack is made. And tested (yum). The children have been given toast (I know you were worried about them…).

– I have nipped out to the secondary school with Two to see about buying him a blazer and tie. We should have done this far earlier (he starts on Tuesday), but… yep, that’s the kind of mother I am… School office all dark and empty. I am now hoping very hard that it will be open on Monday. Curses to my disorganisation and chaos!

Please tell me we are not the only ones living in squalor, chaos and disorganisation at the moment? I mean, it is always chaos here in our house but really, this is way past even what I am used to right now and I am struggling to cope! I am at the ‘where the hell to start, and anyway I don’t even have time’ stage of the holidays now.

Tea. It is, of course, the answer to almost everything. Now, can I find the kettle?…

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8 thoughts on “It’s that point in the holidays where everything starts to fall apart…

  1. Helen, I am currently “enjoying” exactly the same kind of day. Managed to get the girls off the sofa, teeth cleaned, hair brushed and dressed ready to go out and do some errands.

    We have the obligatory letter from the library threatening us with legal action if we don’t return Horrid Henry and the King of Tiny Things. Spent 45 minutes looking for them. To no avail. Stopped looking when I knew the library had closed for lunch anyway. Still don’t know where they are.

    Went to our big Schoolwear shop that is open til 9pm every night during August. Unfortunately, every other Mother in the district chose to go the last Friday afternoon too and the queue was literally out the door. (Slaters is a warehouse that would fit 2 church halls in it!) Promptly turned around and walked out. Surely life is too short to queue for an hour for gym shorts?

    Next went to a shopping estate with the intention of treating the girls to Burger King as their final lunch before school starts. Just seconds before I got out the car, Erin helpfully tells me that she is hungry, it is lunchtime and wouldn’t lunch at Burger King be a good idea. The red mist descended. I can’t bear the children spoiling surprises. Why do they have to open their mouths? Shouldn’t they remain quiet and silently hope that lunch is going to be offered? I was in such a fuming rage that we immediately got back in the car and drove straight home. Upon arrival, I pointed them to the kitchen and told them to get their own lunch.

    No library, no uniform, no lunch. What a successful day! I now have to work the 3 hours required of me for my new job this afternoon. Oh and I missed a parcel delivery whilst out.

    What’s worse still is the children coped with the disappointment of losing their treat very well but I ended up in tears as I hate being so cross and furious with them. 7 weeks is far too long for Summer holidays. It is very hard keeping it together in these last few days.

    Oh, and I have to get Caitlin new shoes before Tuesday. She is an E fitting narrow foot with orthopedic insoles. I tell the enthusiastic assistant that she will need to bring me the one or two pairs of shoes that may fit the criteria and after an hour we usually wave the dispondent assistant bye bye empty handed. i am in denial that I have yet to go through this process.

    Sending hugs and strength xxx

  2. I got back from camping at a festival on tuesday afternoon – today (friday I believe) I finally got round to soaking in VERY hot water the rather disgusting extremely smelly washing up from it. The washing up included my cereal bowl which never got more than a token rinse during the weekend and had dried on oozy smelly milk and cereal when I got it home…. (breakfast was bought on site on tuesday morning – wonder why???) And I’ve had to have the back door open all day in an attempt to get rid of the smell.
    Still got to face washing it up properly but at least it’s not quite so smelly now!

    And I think I’m going to have to clean the fridge as Chris bought some reduced raw pigs heart before I went away and only cooked half of it – threw the rest away this morning…

      • It actually only took me about 20 minutes to empty it, bin a few bits (including very smelly potatoes) and then wipe it out and put stuff back neatly – and it is so much nicer now, AND I do feel really proud of myself for managing it.

        But the festival washing up is still sitting in the water and needs proper washing up and then rinsing with fresh from the kettle water to make sure it’s ok to pack away for the winter!

  3. If it’s any consolation, my bathroom is so disgusting, I bath as quickly as possible in case I catch something while I’m in there! My fridge is growing things and the only reason I have clean plates is because I have a dishwasher! *hugs*

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